What goes under your feet and over your head?

A jump rope.
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What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?

Sir.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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I rang up British Telecom, I said, "I want to report a nuisance caller",

he said "Not you again".

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What's a puppy's favorite kind of pizza?

Pupperoni.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with

but I've been trippin' all day.
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