What goes under your feet and over your head?

A jump rope.
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Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish
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What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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Trump: "It's not a toupee,

I just found the Bush that Jeb lost."
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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What kind of music do planets sing?

Neptunes!
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A tree in a golden forest.
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Why did the TV cross the road?

Because it wanted to be a flat screen.
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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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