What goes under your feet and over your head?

A jump rope.
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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Ah, I had a great boomerang joke...

It'll come back to me.
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Why do they bury lawyers under 20 feet of dirt?

Because deep down, they're really good people.
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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.
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