What goes under your feet and over your head?

A jump rope.
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.
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What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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Anyone know any jokes about sodium?

Na
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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How many punk rockers does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and seventeen on the guest list.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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