What goes under your feet and over your head?

A jump rope.
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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Why did Venus have to get an air conditioner?

Because Mercury moved in.
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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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How do you handle dangerous cheese?

Caerphilly.
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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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