What goes under your feet and over your head?

A jump rope.
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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What is Donald Trumps campaign slogan?

"A complex world demands complex hair."
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech?

After you die, a leech stops sucking your blood.
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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What did the judge say to the dentist?

Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth?
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Why does a stork stand on one leg?

Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.
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