What goes under your feet and over your head?

A jump rope.
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?

A mouse on vacation.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?

Sir.
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