What goes under your feet and over your head?

A jump rope.

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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.

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Why did the oreo go to the dentist?

To get his filling!
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.

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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...

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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.

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What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.

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How many orgy attenders does it take to change a lightbulb?

As many as possible, and don't *ask* what they do with the old bulb.


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"Mommy, everyone says I look like a werewolf."

"Please be quiet and comb your face."
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