What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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What starts with E, ends with E and only has one letter?

An envelope.
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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How did the bubble gum cross the road?

On the bottom of the chicken's foot!
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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