What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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Why can't you say a joke while standing on ice?

Because it might crack up!
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What did Michael Jackson say to Woody Allen?

Got two fives for a ten?
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How do chickens get strong?

Egg-cersize.
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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