What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No I deer
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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How many WASPs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Silly, WASPs don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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There were two cows in a paddock. One of the cows says, "moo"

and the other one says, "That's what I was going to say."
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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