What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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How many managers does it take to change a light bulb?

Nearly unanswerable, since the one who tries to change it usually drops it, and the others call for a planning session.
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What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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Why does cheese look sane?

Because everything else on the plate is crackers.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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Four fonts walk into a bar

the barman says "Oi - get out! We don't want your type in here"

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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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