What happens when you play Beethoven backwards?

He decomposes.

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Why are elephants wrinkled?

Because they don't fit on a ironing board
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What nails do carpenters hate to hit?

Fingernails.
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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Where would an astronaut park his space ship?

A parking meteor!
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What do you call a calf after it's six months old?

Seven months old.
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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