What happens when you play "the blues" backwards?

Your wife comes back to you, your dog returns to life and you get out of prison.

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Does it take longer to run from 1st base to 2nd, or from 2nd to 3rd?

From 2nd to 3rd because there's a shortstop in the middle.
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.

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How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.

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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink

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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang

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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang

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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh

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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights

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