What has four legs but never stands?

A Chair!
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How many UFO buffs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. You don't believe me do you? I've got photos! See that big blob? Well, just squint your eyes a bit. . . .
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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What would you call a humorous knee?

Fun-ny!
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Why did Lil Wayne go to the Doctor?

He was feeling a Lil Weezy

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What does cheese like to drink?

Morbier
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How many Mensans does it take to tell Mensa light bulb jokes?

Five. One to tell the joke and one to get it.
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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What's the definition of a minor second?

Two flutes playing in unison.

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