What has four legs but never stands?

A Chair!
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Why did the boy take a ruler to bed?

To see how long he slept.
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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What`s black & white & red all over?

An embarrased mime!
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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

"Many hands make light work."
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Why did the cucumber call 911?

It was in a pickle!
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