What has holes all over and holds water?

A sponge!
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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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Why did the banana split?

It saw the ginger snap.
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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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How many pre-med students does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: One to change the bulb and four to pull the ladder out from under him/her.
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What washes up on small beaches?

Microwaves.
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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What starts with E, ends with E and only has one letter?

An envelope.
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