What has holes all over and holds water?

A sponge!
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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Two satellites decided to get married.

The wedding wasn't much, but the reception was incredible!
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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What did the necktie say to the hat?

You go on ahead. I'll hang around for a while.
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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