What has holes all over and holds water?

A sponge!
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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What two things can you not have for breakfast?

Lunch and dinner.
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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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