What has holes all over and holds water?

A sponge!
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How did the egg cross the road?

It scrambled across!
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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How many believable, competent, ``just-right-for-the-job'' presidential candidates does it take to change a light bulb?

It's going to be a dark 4 years, isn't it?
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