What has holes all over and holds water?

A sponge!
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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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What do you call a snarky criminal going down the stairs?

[A Condesending con descending]
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand?

Not enough sand.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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