What has holes all over and holds water?

A sponge!
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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What's the only difference between Donald Trump and Bozo the Clown?

Bozo The Clown has real hair on his head.
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How do you know when its Michael Jacksons bed time ?

When the big hand touches the little hand
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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