What has holes all over and holds water?

A sponge!
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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What is the difference between a locomotive engineer and a teacher?

One minds the train, one trains the mind.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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What's the difference between a mosquito and a lawyer?

One is a blood-sucking parasite, the other is an insect.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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