A sponge!
or
The man says: "You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you."
or
In the neigh-borhood.
or
Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes.
or
One. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.
or
Because they are black and white.
or