What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow
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Why did the football coach go to the bank?

To get his quarterback.
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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline?

You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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