What has three letters and starts with gas?

A car
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How many gods does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to hold the bulb and the other to rotate the planet.
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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Why did the thief take a shower?

He wanted to make a clean getaway!
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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What's the difference between a tuba and a vacumn cleaner?

You have to turn one of them on before it sucks.

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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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What did the sub-atmoic ducks say?

Quark!
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