What has three letters and starts with gas?

A car
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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What do you call a fat pumpkin?

A plumpkin.
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.
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Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
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What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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