What has three letters and starts with gas?

A car
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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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How do you know an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

There are footprints in the butter.
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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What can you hold without ever touching it?

A conversation.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline?

You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.
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Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon
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Why did God invent lawyers?

So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.
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