What has three letters and starts with gas?

A car
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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How does an attorney sleep?

First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.
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What is the best time to go to the dentist?

Tooth-hurty.
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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What's the definition of a minor second?

Two flutes playing in unison.

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