What has three letters and starts with gas?

A car
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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Where do you learn to make banana splits?

In sundae school.
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon!
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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Trump: "It's not a toupee,

I just found the Bush that Jeb lost."
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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How many charismatics does it take to change a light bulb?

Three - one to cast the bulb into the outer darkness, and two to catch it when it falls.
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