What has three letters and starts with gas?

A car
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Why is tennis such a loud game?

Because each player raises a racquet.
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When can't you see a cheese?

When it's pasteurised...
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What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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What is the difference between a guitarist and a Savings Bond?

Eventually a Savings Bond will mature and earn money!

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How do you fix a broken vegetable?

With tomato paste.
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