What has three letters and starts with gas?

A car
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I stayed up all night because I wanted to see where the sun went,

and then it dawned on me.
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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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What message did Bach have on his answering machine?

"This phone is baroque, please call Bach later."

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How many Iraqis does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It doesn't matter, they don't have any electricity any more.
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What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?

Sir.
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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How many frat guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and the other two to help him down off the keg.
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