What has three letters and starts with gas?

A car
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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How do you know when the moon has enough to eat?

When it's full.
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How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.
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What do you call a smiling, sober, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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How many Jewish American Princesses does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call Daddy, and one to get the (pick one:) mineral water/Tab.
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Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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How do you catch a unique bird?

Unique up on it.
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So the Pillsbury Doughboy's pants fell off and I..

feel really weird about donuts right now.
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