What has three letters and starts with gas?

A car

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What do you call 25 attorneys buried up to their chins in cement?

Not enough cement.
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday

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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.

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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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What do a baker and a millionaire have in common?

They are both rolling in the dough!

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How many (Generals/Politicians) does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.

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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!

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Why did they kick cinderella off the baseball team?

She kept running away from the ball.
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