What has three letters and starts with gas?

A car
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Why does a stork stand on one leg?

Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.
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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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How many archaeologists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One team, but they'll label every piece of the old one, mark its location in the room, and write a detailed description before determining that it was used to store cornmeal.
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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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How many U.S. Marines does it take to change a light bulb?

Fifty — one to screw in the bulb and 49 to guard him/her.
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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