What has three letters and starts with gas?

A car
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Which runs faster, hot or cold water?

Hot, because you can catch cold.
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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What do you get if you enroll in a liberal arts program and the only subject you do well in is music?

A natural major.
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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How do Eskimos make their beds?

With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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PMS jokes are not funny...

[Period]
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What did Michael Jackson say to Woody Allen?

Got two fives for a ten?
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