What has three letters and starts with gas?

A car
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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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What did the baby corn ask the mother corn?

Where is pop corn?
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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What do you call cheese that isn't yours?

Nacho cheese.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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"Dyslexic man walks into a bra"
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Why did the melon jump into the lake?

It wanted to be a watermelon.
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