What is a boxer's favorite drink?

Punch.
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off.

"because," he said "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."
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How many chiropractors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but it takes six visits.
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What do you call a loony spaceman?

An astronut.
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What's 182 feet tall and made out of pepperoni and cheese?

The leaning tower of Pizza.
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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What do a viola and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is happy when the case is closed

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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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