What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies
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Why did the tomato blush?

Because he saw the salad dressing!
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Why don't honest people need beds?

They don't lie.
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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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What happens when you play Beethoven backwards?

He decomposes.

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How many APL hackers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There's a primitive for that.
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What do you call a cow with three legs?

Lean beef.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

You crack me up!
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