What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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What do Michael Jackson and x-boxs have in common?

They're both plastic and little boys turn them on.
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Why don't they know where Mozart is buried?

Because he's Haydn.

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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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What's 182 feet tall and made out of pepperoni and cheese?

The leaning tower of Pizza.
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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