What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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How many Jewish renewal rabbis does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends. One, if it's an eco-kosher bulb that isn't going to be lit by electricity generated from nuclear power. Two, as long as a man and a woman rabbi have equal turns putting in the bulb. Three, one to change it, one to do a Buddhist mindfulness practice during the change, and one to document the paradigm shift in a best-selling book called The Jew in the Lightbulb. Four, same as above plus an additional rabbi to study the psycho-halachic implications of such a change and then lead a retreat weekend on the experience.
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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.
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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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