What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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What did the alien say to the garden?

Take me to your weeder!
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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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How many U.S marines does it take to screw in a light bulb?

50. One to screw in the light bulb and the remaining 49 to guard him .
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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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Why did the gardener plant his money?

He wanted his soil to be rich!
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