What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine
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What does cheese say to itself in the mirror?

Halloumi.
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A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off.

"because," he said "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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How many Bell Labs vice presidents does it take to change a light bulb?

That's proprietary information. The answer is available from AT&T on payment of license fee (binary only).
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.
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