What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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How many referral agents does it take to change a light bulb?

Two: One to screw you out of a fee, and the other to send you to a store where they ran out of bulbs weeks ago.
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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What did Tennessee?
The same thing Arkansas.
What did Delaware?

Her New Jersey.
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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