What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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How are an apple and a lawyer alike?

They both look good hanging from a tree.
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