What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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Where do all the letters sleep?

In the alphabed.
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin!
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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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Once there was a family called the Biggers. There was Mr. Bigger, Mrs. Bigger, and their son. Who was bigger, Mr. Bigger or his son?

His son, because he's a little Bigger!
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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