What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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How many freelance biotechnologists does it take to change a light bulb?

One; she designs the bulb to crawl up the wall, unscrew the old one, and screw itself in.
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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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Whats the difference between Terrorists and Accordion players?

Terrorists have sympathizers

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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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What do you call a lawyer gone bad.

Senator.
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What do you call a loony spaceman?

An astronut.
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