What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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You see my next-door neighbour worships exhaust pipes,

he's a catholic converter.


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I stayed up all night because I wanted to see where the sun went,

and then it dawned on me.
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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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