What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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PMS jokes are not funny...

[Period]
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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What goes up and down but never moves?

Stairs.
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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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