What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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How many light bulbs does it take to change a light bulb?

One, if it knows its own Goedel number.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?

H2O cubed.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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