What is at the end of everything?

The letter G.
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That girl said she knew me from the vegitarian club,

but I'd never seen herbivore [her before]
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I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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What's a royal pardon?

It's what the queen says after she burps.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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What do you call 25 attorneys buried up to their chins in cement?

Not enough cement.
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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies
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