What is at the end of everything?

The letter G.
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Why was the vacationing doctor so mad?

He had no patients.
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I swear, the other day I bought a packet of peanuts, and on the packet it said "may contain nuts." Well, YES! That's what I bought the buggers for!

You'd be annoyed if you opened it and a socket set fell out!"

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Why did the Blonde stare at the Orange Juice carton?

Because it said CONCENTRATE.
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.
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There were five people under one umbrella. Why didn't they get wet?

It wasn't raining!
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What does cheese say to itself in the mirror?

Halloumi.
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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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