What is at the end of everything?

The letter G.
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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Why did the news reporter go to the ice cream parlor?

Because she wanted to get a good scoop.
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How many Ukrainians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None, because people who glow in the dark don't need light bulbs.

Note: Topical to the Chernobyl Reactor disaster of 1984.
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.
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I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase.

I can hardly contain myself.

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