What is at the end of everything?

The letter G.
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What can you hold without using your hands?

Your breath!
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

The lawyer charges more.
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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Why did the scientist take out his doorbell?

He wanted to win the no-bell prize!
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