What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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What do Russians use for napkins?

Soviets
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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 ate 9.
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