What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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How many UNIX hacks does it take to change a light bulb?

As many as you want; they're all virtual anyway.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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