What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin

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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?

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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a gigolo?

A gigolo only screws one person at a time.
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Why did God make snakes just before lawyers?

To practice.
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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.

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Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish

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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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I stayed up all night because I wanted to see where the sun went,

and then it dawned on me.
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