What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin

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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.

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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!

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Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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How does an Eskimo stick his house together?

With igloo!
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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What do you call a calf after it's six months old?

Seven months old.

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