What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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I was in Tesco's and I saw this man and woman wrapped in a barcode.

I said, "Are you two an item?"

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How many subscribers to AOL does it take to change a light bulb?

What? You can change light bulbs?
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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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Why are kindergarten teachers so good?

They can make little things count.
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Why can't Donald Trump be a Lannister?

Because he never pays his debts.
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What does a cat call a hummingbird?

Fast food.
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How many Feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

That's not funny!!!
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