What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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Trump: "It's not a toupee,

I just found the Bush that Jeb lost."
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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How many Bratzlaver Hasidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find a bulb that burns as brightly as the old one.
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What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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What are lawyers good for?

They make used car salesmen look good.
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