What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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What do you get if you enroll in a liberal arts program and the only subject you do well in is music?

A natural major.
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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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What country makes you shiver?

Chile.
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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Why did the chicken cross the clothing store?

To get to the other size!
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