What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

"Many hands make light work."
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Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon?

Great food, no atmosphere.
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What is a frog's favorite year?

Leap Year
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What is the world's longest punctuation mark?

The hundred yard dash.
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Why don't mountains get cold in the winter?

They wear snowcaps.
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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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