What is Donald Trumps favorite song?

ICE ICE Baby......
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How do you get a cello player to play in tune?

Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.

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How many supporters of George W. Bush does it take to change a light bulb?

None. First, denounce the nearest Democrats as liberal pantywaists who deliberately caused the bulb to blow. Second, announce that the Bush administration has proved that the science of electricity is faulty, so no action ever needs to be taken on global light change. Third, keep the need for a new light bulb strictly secret. Fourth, use the money for new light bulbs as an excuse for another tax cut for Bush's wealthy friends. Fifth, explain that you would never "disassemble" about the need for light, you are way too busy spreading freedom and democracy in the Middle East by eliminating freedom and democracy in the United States.
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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A man goes to a zoo and discovers there is only one animal and it's a dog.

It was a Shih Tzu
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What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start!
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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