What is "HIJKLMNO"?

H2O.
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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What do you call a loony spaceman?

An astronut.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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I'm sorry we can't let the elephants back into the public pool.

They keep dropping their trunks.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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