What is only a small box but can weigh over a hundred pounds?

A scale.
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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Why did the boy have his girlfriend put in jail?

She stole his heart.
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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What do you call 25 skydiving lawyers?

Skeet.
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What do you call a young army?

Infantry.
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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