What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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What is a tornado's favorite game?

Twister!
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What concert costs 45 cents?

50 cent featuring Nickelback

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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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How can you get four suits for a dollar?


Buy a deck of cards.
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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