What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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Why did the computer squeak?

Someone stepped on its mouse.
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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Why did Lil Wayne go to the Doctor?

He was feeling a Lil Weezy

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