What is the difference between a lawyer and a rooster?

When a rooster wakes up in the morning, its primal urge is to cluck defiance.
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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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What's a tree's favorite drink?

Rootbeer.
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

Many hands make light work.
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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What is Donald Trumps campaign slogan?

"A complex world demands complex hair."
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What do you call a cow that's just given birth?

[De-Calf-Inated]
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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