What is the difference between a locomotive engineer and a teacher?

One minds the train, one trains the mind.
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How can you tell that a train just went by?

It left its tracks.
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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.
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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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How many Feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

That's not funny!!!
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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