What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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What did one magnet say to the other?

I find you very attractive.
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Why did the thief take a shower?

He wanted to make a clean getaway!
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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How many data base people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three:

One to write the light bulb removal program,
one to write the light bulb insertion program, and

one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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