What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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Why did Bach have so many children?

He did not have a stop on his organ.

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The stormtrooper was enjoying the Wookie steak,

but it was a little Chewie.
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What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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