What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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Ah, I had a great boomerang joke...

It'll come back to me.
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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How many socialists does it take to change a light bulb?

One to petition the Ministry of Light for a bulb, 50 to establish the state production quota, 200 militia to force the factory unions to allow production of the bulb, and one to surreptitiously dial an "800" number to order an American light bulb.
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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