What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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How many record producers does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two… one to tell the engineer to do it, the other to say "I don't know, what do you think?"

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How many Iraqis does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It doesn't matter, they don't have any electricity any more.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva
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Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
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