What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"
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How many data base people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three:

One to write the light bulb removal program,
one to write the light bulb insertion program, and

one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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What do you get if you cross a cat with a dark horse?

Kitty Perry

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