What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.
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What is the chemical formula for "banana"?

BaNa2
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The oddly pleasant feeling of looking down on a physist as they drink the last of their beer.

The strange charm of a top down bottoms up.
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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I went down the local supermarket, I said, "I want to make a complaint, this vinegar's got lumps in it",

he said, "Those are pickled onions".

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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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