What kind of underwear to reporters wear?

News briefs.
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What is the world's longest punctuation mark?

The hundred yard dash.
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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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How many assholes does it take to change a light bulb?

None; assholes never see the light anyway.
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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How many IBM PC owners does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but she/he'll have to go out and buy the light bulb adaptor card first, which is extra.
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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