What kind of underwear to reporters wear?

News briefs.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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How many believable, competent, ``just-right-for-the-job'' presidential candidates does it take to change a light bulb?

It's going to be a dark 4 years, isn't it?
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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A man goes to a zoo and discovers there is only one animal and it's a dog.

It was a Shih Tzu
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Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
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A lorry-load of tortoises crashed into a trainload of terrapins,

What a turtle disaster

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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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