What message did Bach have on his answering machine?

"This phone is baroque, please call Bach later."

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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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What goes up and down but never moves?

Stairs.
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What breakfast cereal does Frosty the Snowman eat?

Snowflakes.
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I was having dinner with Garry Kasporov (world chess champion) and there was a check tablecloth.

It took him two hours to pass me the salt.
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What kind of phones do people in jail use?

Cell phones
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Why is tennis such a loud game?

Because each player raises a racquet.
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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What bird can lift the most?

A crane.
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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