What message did Bach have on his answering machine?

"This phone is baroque, please call Bach later."

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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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Why would Snow White make a great judge?

She was the fairest in the land.
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There was an explosion at a cheese factory in France...

all that was left was de brie.
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with

but I've been trippin' all day.
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How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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