What message did Bach have on his answering machine?

"This phone is baroque, please call Bach later."

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic
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Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon
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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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