What message did Bach have on his answering machine?

"This phone is baroque, please call Bach later."

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What's the definition of perfect pitch?

When you toss a banjo in the garbage and it hits an accordion.

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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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What is "HIJKLMNO"?

H2O.
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Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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Why did the thief take a shower?

He wanted to make a clean getaway!
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Why did the orange stop in the middle of the hill?

It ran out of juice!
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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