What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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