What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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What do you call a chicken in the 1960's?

A funky chicken.
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What's the one thing that never works when it's fixed?

A jury.
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I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

Because if they flew over the bay, they'd be baygulls!
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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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How many actors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. They don't like to share the spotlight.
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How do you open the great lakes?

With the Florida Keys.
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What's the difference between an accountant and a lawyer?

Accountants know they're boring.
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