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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?
Parachute school!
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A lorry-load of tortoises crashed into a trainload of terrapins,
What a turtle disaster
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How do you get a trombonist off of your porch?
Pay him for the pizza
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What has holes all over and holds water?
A sponge!
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What did one volcano say to the other?
I lava you.
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What's the definition of a minor second?
Two flutes playing in unison.
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?
A woolen jumper
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,
but I don't want one of them for my husband".
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What type of cars do elves drive?
Toy-otas.
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