What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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What are the 10 letters of the pirate alphabet?

Aye, Aye, Arr and the Seven C's
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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How does a train sneeze?

Ah-choo-choo!
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What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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