What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.
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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut
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What do Michael Jackson and Malt Whiskey have in common?

They both come in tots.
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Why did the chicken cross the clothing store?

To get to the other size!
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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