What' the difference between a lawyer and a boxing referee?

A boxing referee doesn't get paid more for a longer fight.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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What do lawyers wear in court?

Lawsuits.
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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How many Federal employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Sorry, that item has been cut from the budget!
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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How many accountants does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What kind of answer did you have in mind?
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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