What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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Why don't honest people need beds?

They don't lie.
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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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