What two things can you not have for breakfast?

Lunch and dinner.
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What's the difference between an accountant and a lawyer?

Accountants know they're boring.
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Anyone know any jokes about sodium?

Na
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Did you hear about Michael Jackson's latest record?

"Feel the World."
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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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How many UFO buffs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. You don't believe me do you? I've got photos! See that big blob? Well, just squint your eyes a bit. . . .
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What do you call 25 skydiving lawyers?

Skeet.
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