What was the farmer doing on the other side of the road?

He was catching all the chickens!
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand?

Not enough sand.
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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut
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Why was the baseball game so hot?

Because all the fans left!
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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