What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.
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What do you call a snarky criminal going down the stairs?

[A Condesending con descending]
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What kind of math do Snowy Owls like?

Owlgebra
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What happened when the butcher backed up into his meat grinder?

he got a little behind in his work.
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.
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Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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