What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.
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How many frat guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and the other two to help him down off the keg.
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What do you call a cow with three legs?

Lean beef.
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Four fonts walk into a bar

the barman says "Oi - get out! We don't want your type in here"

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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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Slept like a log last night........

Woke up in the fireplace.

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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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