What's a light-year?

The same as a regular year, but with less calories.
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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?

Discrimination.
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What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".
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What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand?

Not enough sand.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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How many frat guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and the other two to help him down off the keg.
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Now that Macy's has severed ties, with Donald Trump, how can the average American look like the President?

By hunting and killing their own hair piece.
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What is the best time to go to the dentist?

Tooth-hurty.
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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