What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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"Mommy, everyone says I look like a werewolf."

"Please be quiet and comb your face."
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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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How many teenage girls does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One, but she'll be on the phone for five hours telling all her friends about it.
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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What is an astronauts favorite key on the keyboard?

The space bar!
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