What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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What did one flower say to the other flower?

Hey, bud!
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Have you heard the joke about the butter?

I better not tell you, it might spread.
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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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