What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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What do postal workers do when they're mad?

They stamp their feet.
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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What did the octopus say to his girlfriend when he proposed?

Can I have your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand in marriage?
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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What did one elevator say to the other?

I think I'm coming down with something!
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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