What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a prostitute?

A prostitute will stop screwing you when you're dead.
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What do postal workers do when they're mad?

They stamp their feet.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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How many UFO buffs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. You don't believe me do you? I've got photos! See that big blob? Well, just squint your eyes a bit. . . .
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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