What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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What runs around a yard without moving?

A fence.
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Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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They stopped a vulture from bringing his rotting carcasses on the plane

but he said "You said I could have two carry on items!"
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Interesting story, the guy who helped me learn algebra never farted around anyone.

I mean he did say he was a private tutor.
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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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How many ergonomicists does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. Four to decide which way the bulb ought to turn, and . . .
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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