What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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How many Jewish renewal rabbis does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends. One, if it's an eco-kosher bulb that isn't going to be lit by electricity generated from nuclear power. Two, as long as a man and a woman rabbi have equal turns putting in the bulb. Three, one to change it, one to do a Buddhist mindfulness practice during the change, and one to document the paradigm shift in a best-selling book called The Jew in the Lightbulb. Four, same as above plus an additional rabbi to study the psycho-halachic implications of such a change and then lead a retreat weekend on the experience.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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What's the slipperiest country?

Greece!
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What's the best parting gift?

A comb.
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How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Any changes will have to be implemented in software.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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How do Eskimos make their beds?

With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
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