What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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Whats the difference between Terrorists and Accordion players?

Terrorists have sympathizers

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What do you call a calf after it's six months old?

Seven months old.
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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