What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks.

They charged one - and let the other one off.

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What did the painter say to the wall?

I got you covered.
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Why did the girl throw the butter out the window?

She wanted to see a butterfly.
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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What's the difference between a musician and a 14-inch pizza?

A 14-inch pizza can feed a family of four

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What did the pencil say to the paper?

I dot my i's on you!
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What's the difference between a tuba and a vacumn cleaner?

You have to turn one of them on before it sucks.

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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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