What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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How many TV comedians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to say "Sock it to Me." (Notes: Sock it = Socket. Also, for the infant readers among you, this was a popular catch-phrase from "Laugh In.")
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Why can't you say a joke while standing on ice?

Because it might crack up!
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What has a bed that you can't sleep in?

A river.
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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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What did Delaware?

A New Jersey.
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I stayed up all night because I wanted to see where the sun went,

and then it dawned on me.
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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