What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

The lawyer charges more.
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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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What is Donald Trump "really" trying to do?

Make America Hate Again.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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