What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?

It gave a little wine
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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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