What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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How many Californians does it take to change a light bulb?

Six. One to turn the bulb, one for support, and four to relate to the experience.
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When should you buy a bird?

When it's going cheep!

Did you hear the one about the crow and the telephone pole?
He wanted to make a long distance caw.
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

You crack me up!
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Why does a stork stand on one leg?

Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.
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What do you call a snowman in the desert?

A puddle!
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