What's brown and looks really good on a lawyer?

A Doberman.
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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What's a puppy's favorite kind of pizza?

Pupperoni.
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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Three people were in a boat. They all fell off. Only two people ended up with wet hair. Why didn't the other person's hair get wet?

Because he was bald!
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Why don't mountains get cold in the winter?

They wear snowcaps.
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What nails do carpenters hate to hit?

Fingernails.
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What are lawyers good for?

They make used car salesmen look good.
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