What's round and bad-tempered?

A vicious circle.
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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What do you call a calf after it's six months old?

Seven months old.
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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