What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in mud, then cross the road again?

He was a dirty double crosser!
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What do you call a lawyer gone bad.

Senator.
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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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Why is slippery ice like music?

If you don't C sharp - you'll B flat!

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