What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.
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Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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