What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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How do you get a trombonist off of your porch?

Pay him for the pizza

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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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