What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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There's two fish in a tank, and one says "How do you drive this thing?"
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Can you say Richard and Robert had a rabbit without using the "r" sound?

Sure, Dick and Bob had a bunny!
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".
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How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.
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