What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of manure?

The bucket.
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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Why do hummingbirds hum?

Because they don't know the words.
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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