What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of manure?

The bucket.
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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How many light bulbs does it take to change a light bulb?

One, if it knows its own Goedel number.
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What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand?

Not enough sand.
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That girl said she knew me from the vegitarian club,

but I'd never seen herbivore [her before]
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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And the mermaid, that was weird. What was she wearing in math class?

An Algae-bra
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What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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